Each day we get a little further from winter and a little deeper into spring. It’s easy to tell that this transition is underway not just because it says so on our calendars, but also because of a few natural processes you can observe happening every year. Here are 14 ways to tell that spring is coming.
1. Birds have started chirping again, waking you up at 4 in the goddamn morning.
2. Shirtless douchebags have started playing guitar in the quad.
3. You start thinking that “taking a walk” will be fun somehow.
4. Weird vegetable juices are becoming popular again.
5. All that horrible snow turns into all this horrible rain.
6. You start feeling guilty for staying inside and watching TV all day.
7. Your rich neighbor has started talking about his boat more.
8. There’s just this constant sound of children playing, throwing you into a depressive spiral over your lost youth.
9. The sun is setting later so your commute home sucks now.
10. Attractive people have started to wear about 60% less clothing.
11. There’s a resurgence of golf, tennis and other white people sports.
12. Your eyes have begun watering more than you ever thought possible as your nose starts to generate so much snot that you’re wondering if you’re losing weight somehow.
13. Adorable little fuzzy creatures start popping out – more targets.
DISCLAIMER: Circus Killer News is a faux news blog. None of the stories on this site should be taken seriously or literally.