Many interesting things happened in 2014. Among them, strangely enough, was a record-high number of terrible people and crappy behavior. Here is a list of the 14 worst people across the continental United States in the last year:
1. Michael Dunlow, a media consultant in New York, who deliberately held the “close doors” button on an elevator as a pregnant coworker approached.
2. Luke Browning, a teenager in Mildred, Vermont, who promised his parents he’d check in while out with his friends but never did.
3. Melissa Perkins who brings all three of her toddlers out to dinner five nights out of the week.
4. Gary L. Araz who is evidently incapable of understanding how to put a toilet seat down.
5. Dana Greene of Garrettsburg, Virginia, who spends more time composing and publishing political messages on Facebook than she does applying to jobs.
6. Sarah Charters of Benford, Illinois, who was spotted doing 40 miles an hour in a 65 zone.
7. Mason Mitchell of the same town, spotted doing 90 in the same zone.
8. K. F. McCormick who refuses to use his first name like a normal person.
9. Marianne Park, a Los Angeles cleaning lady who only moves objects that she’s been explicitly instructed not to touch.
10. Dante Anderson of Redenboro, New Jersey, for bringing up his tattoos an average of 16.8 times per conversation.
11. Mark Baker, a 14-year-old YouTube commenter.
12. Kevin Chen who doesn’t pick up after his dog during walks.
13. Brenda Freeman, a McDonald’s cashier in Curtsdale, Florida, who talks to her coworkers while taking people’s orders.
14. John Mulaney.
Circus Killer News: @circuskillernws
Circus Killer: @circuskillerprd | Ask.fm
By Jacob S. Wydra: @jswydra
DISCLAIMER: Circus Killer News is a faux news blog. None of the stories on this site should be taken seriously or literally.