Nation Celebrates Vice President’s Day

All across the country, Americans have taken off of work to celebrate Vice President’s Day, one of the nation’s biggest and most extravagant holidays.

Americans have been lining the streets of Washington D.C. all morning to catch the famous Vice President’s Day Parade in which floats and balloons honoring the nation’s most prominent VPs remind us all who are leaders would have been in the event of a tragedy.

This year’s most popular parade displays were the Al Gore balloon which excreted pollen for a variety of different trees and plants, followed by the Dick Cheney balloon that showered people in 36,000 gallons of crude oil.

At home, many Americans have been enjoying traditional Vice President’s Day games, including “Bobbing for Walter Mondale’s Dignity,” and “Pin-the-Hair-on-the-Martin-van-Buren.”

Of course, as with every year, the traditional “Sprio Agnew’s Unfiled Income Hunt” was held on the White House lawn, a game for which there are no winners.

Current Vice President Joe Biden used the Magical and Unrestricted Vice Presidential Wish that he gets today to remove a “PARTY HARD OR DIE” tattoo from his abdomen, tax free.

 

Circus Killer News: @circuskillernws
Circus Killer: @circuskillerprd | Ask.fm
By Jacob S. Wydra: @jswydra

DISCLAIMER: Circus Killer News is a faux news blog. None of the stories on this site should be taken seriously or literally.

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